You know, when I was creating this website, I wanted it to look perfect. I wanted to make myself look perfect so that you would believe in me, my products, and my services. I almost didn't even post my story for you to learn about me. But then I realized that that's not really how I want to portray myself. I'm not perfect. But I am authentic. My story hasn't always been pretty. But it's mine and I'm here to own it and share it with you.
I'm not entirely sure where my "story" starts. I know where it started to go wrong though. I was a senior in high school when I first started displaying disordered eating tendencies. I didn't realize it then, but other people started to notice and comment on what I'd eat (or not eat) for lunch. At the same time, I was dealing with some digestive issues so I was on an elimination diet and could hide behind that since it was something I "had" to do. I became vegan and gluten free. It lasted 3 months.
When I went to college, I chose to go out of state where only 2 other people from my high school went. I roomed with my best friend of 13 years and to say it was a miserable experience is an understatement. I dealt with depression for the very first time and slept all day every day. At this time, I had healed from my previous disordered eating only to fall into a full on eating disorder that nobody knew about. It wasn't until almost a year later that I got it under control and shared that part of my life with anyone.
As a sophomore, I had my depression and eating disorder under wraps and things were looking up. I started dating a guy who I was crazy about. When he told me he was having doubts, all of my insecurities and anxiety set in. I became an insomniac. He was still in love with his ex, but he wouldn't break up with me and I was too weak of a person to do anything about it myself. I was again depressed, dealing with crippling anxiety, not sleeping, and having really dark thoughts. I went to therapy for months, but it didn't help much. I was at the lowest point of my entire life and didn't think I'd make it out.
That summer, I made a last ditch effort to be okay. I decided to transfer schools. I was just a shell of a person with no real future in mind. When I finally got to my new school and away from the environment that had caused me so much pain the previous 2 years, everything changed. I was no longer a slave to my own misery. I was able to be the person I knew was deep down inside of me and I could reinvent myself. At that turning point, I completely transformed. I became who I am now: confident, empowered, positive, loving, helpful, empathetic, a dreamer and a doer. Now that I've become my best self, I know I can help you too. Join me on this journey!
I will expand upon these things in upcoming posts, but I wanted to be transparent with you all from the start. If you relate or want to talk about your own story, please reach out to me! Can't wait to meet you!